God, can You hear me

God, can You hear me?
I know You know my voice
But the room stays quiet
And I?m scared that silence is Your choice

God, can You hear me? I?ve been speaking through the ceiling
Trying to separate my faith from everything I?m feeling
They say You?re near the broken, well, I?m shattered into pieces
So why do I feel further every time I call on Jesus?

I?m exhausted from pretending I?m okay because I?m praying
Like believing means I never get to question what You?re saying
I?ve been waiting for an answer, I?ve been searching for a sign
But the only voice responding is this damaged one of mine

And I hate that I?m afraid to tell You that I?m disappointed
Like my honesty could somehow make me less of Your anointed
But You knew me in the womb, You know the war inside my head
So You already heard the words I was too terrified to say

I said, ?God, where were You when everything collapsed?
Where were You when I was begging You to give me someone back?
Where were You when every promise felt like salt inside the wound??
I kept staring at the doorway, but You never entered through

God, can You hear me?
I?ve been calling through the pain
I?ve been trying to hold my faith
While my faith is losing strength

God, can You hear me?
I don?t need the sky to move
I just need a little something
That reminds me You are You

God, can You hear me?
Because I cannot hear You now
And I?m trying not to confuse
Your silence with You walking out

God, can You hear me?
I have nothing left to prove
I?m still here, I?m barely breathing
But I?m reaching out to You

Then I thought about the garden, Jesus sweating blood alone
Asking for another way while Heaven wouldn?t change the road
So maybe feeling abandoned doesn?t mean that I?m abandoned
Maybe faith is still obeying when I cannot understand it

Maybe silence isn?t absence, maybe quiet isn?t cruel
Maybe You are doing something I?m too wounded now to view
Maybe every prayer I whispered when I thought You weren?t around
Was a seed beneath the surface, putting roots into the ground

I still don?t have the answers, I still hate the way this hurts
I still cannot see the ending, I still wrestle with Your Word
But I?d rather scream my questions with my face turned up to You
Than find comfort in a lie because I?m scared to face the truth

So here I am, no filter, no religion, no disguise
Just a tired soul with tears collecting underneath my eyes
I don?t know how to praise You, I don?t know what I believe
But if all I have is ?Help me,? let that prayer be enough for me

God, You can hear me
Even when You do not speak
Even when my voice is shaking
Even when my faith is weak

God, You can hear me
Every word and every tear
Maybe I was never lonely
Maybe grief just made it hard to feel You near

God, You can hear me
So I?ll call until I?m through
Not because I have the answers
But because I still have You

God, You can hear me
And tonight that has to be
Enough to keep my heart from breaking
Enough to keep me on my knees

God, can You hear me?
I?m still here

God, can You hear me?
I?m still Yours

Even when I cannot hear You
I?m still calling

I?m still calling